| Music as social control |
[Oct. 25th, 2007|08:42 pm] |
As skeptical as I am of Marxism and socialism, I try to keep in mind that there are MANY things happening under capitalism that shouldn't be. The "free trade" we practice really isn't free at all, so there's more than enough room to criticize. Although I've always thought that one of the biggest differences between Marxism and capitalism is the fact that capitalism isn't supposed to be a panacea (I realize some creepy people pretend it is, but they're whacked out). Anyway, that being said, the oppression and brainwashing that seem to naturally accompany socialism no matter who's practicing it is astonishing. As prominent as socialist thought is today, you'd think this kind of oppression would need some very, very serious explaining and qualifying. Yet I swear to god, I've never heard a socialist individual, media outlet, or organization address the kinds of things that actually go on in real life socialist countries. I have to say, it really pisses me off. Don't hassle me with your little pamphlets until you tell me how your socialist utopia will be so fundamentally egalitarian, it'll never devolve into the cultural quagmire that, say, China (and all the others) has become:
October 25, 2007
Shanghai Memo
The Sound, Not of Music, but of Control
By HOWARD W. FRENCH
SHANGHAI, Oct. 24 — A song often heard on the radio these days begins with a light and upbeat melody, and lyrics that are even bubblier.
“Don’t care about loneliness,” croons the lead singer. “I don’t think it really matters.”
Another much played song tries even harder to soothe. “Ah, little man, ah, succeed quickly,” it counsels. “Enjoy being poor but happy every day.”
Marxists once referred to religion as the opium of the people, but in today’s China it is the music promoted on state-monopolized radio that increasingly claims that role. China’s leader, Hu Jintao, has talked since he assumed power five years ago about “building a harmonious society,” an ambiguous phrase subject to countless interpretations.
( Read more... )
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/25/world/asia/25shanghai.html?_r=1&oref=slogin |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 22nd, 2007|12:16 am] |
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So the Venezuelan congress approved Chavez's constitutional "reforms", potentially allowing him to be "reelected" for eternity. Yet another socialist dictatorship in the making. Hurrah. You'd think people would stop falling for this shit after awhile. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 30th, 2007|01:07 am] |
People who admire Michael Moore should be shot. Sicko is an abomination. I can't believe anyone calling himself a journalist would portray the horrors of the national health care systems in European countries, especially Britain's and France's. We do need to talk about health care in this country. It's a mess, there's no arguing that. But to make a propaganda piece simplifying the multitude of reasons why health care costs so much and disingenuously glorifying socialized medicine in Europe is outrageous.
The worst part is that he has to know the truth. There's no possible way he could have gone to those countries, talked to any number of patients, and not heard the horror stories. The quotas, the queues (yeah, pig-face, they do exist), the shortages, the inadequate care, the cancer patients whose disease goes from treatable to terminal while waiting to see an oncologist. He had to know that the British public has lost faith in the NHS. He had to know that France's health care system is running on a huge deficit. He had to know that real people are really suffering, just like they're suffering here. Yet he chose to depict all of those complex problems as a lie made up by the right and our Francophobia. People should feel insulted that some millionaire, wannabe "Everyman" with a ball cap shamelessly feeds them this crap.
Anyone stupid enough to believe his tripe and push for socialized medicine deserves what they get. I'll continue paying for my health care, thanks. I read the BBC--I don't want the state doling out my care. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 21st, 2007|09:39 pm] |
RIP TAMMY FAYE!!
You were naive and cracked out, but the sweetest and cutest televangelist ever. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 14th, 2007|09:52 pm] |
I am heartbroken. Me and Amy just got back from seeing Harry Potter (fun movie, but those books get way way way more acclaim than they deserve), and there was a preview for the Dark Is Rising movie coming out in October. I already knew they were butching it pretty fucking bad, but it's so much worse than I could have imagined. I knew they were making the Stanton family American (what the FUCK--Harry Potter's characters are all British, there's no need to Americanize the story), and had heard that the Stantons were made to be an American family living in Britain. But when I saw the preview, it didn't seem like any of it took place in the UK. Not only that, but suddenly there's a love interest for Will, a weird family dynamic that doesn't exist in the books, and Will has super human strength and telekinesis. Why? Why why why why why.
It's totally incomprehensible. The appeal of the books is that they're not stupidly magical and pixie-fied. The settings (Britain, Wales, Cornwall) and the parallels to Arthur are what make the books magical. There's almost nothing in any of the books that would require CGI to convey, and the characters definitely don't need additional magic powers. I didn't get the sense that there's anything Arthurian about the movie, which is the whole goddamn point. I can't understand why Susan Cooper would let the filmmakers bastardize her amazing books like that. That preview seriously made me want to cry.
I'm rereading the books for the god knows what time to keep myself from vomiting. I'll probably boycott the movie, since I doubt I could sit through that abomination.
RAWR. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 4th, 2007|01:23 pm] |
I'm getting really restless and bored with my life. I'm already missing school and dreading spending a year or two not making any progress towards my real career. I'm also at a total loss as to what I ought to pursue in grad school. I know what I'm interested in: civil liberties, citizen vs. state, power politics in government, political rhetoric, propaganda, etc. But I don't know what discipline will get me where I want to go. Political science is pretty quantitative, and although some political scientists do field work, I'm not sure I'll get the interdisciplinary-ness and freedom that comes with anthropological field work. Plus I've already made so much progress networking and getting involved in the anthropology community, it'd really be a pain to start all over with a different major. Especially trying to do all that schmoozing in grad school.
However...no one pays attention to anthropology. No one reads it but anthropology students. I don't want to spend my life researching things that I feel are extremely important and that everyone should be more aware of, only to have no impact on anything but some whiny college students' GPAs. Political scientists are a lot more prominent, respected, and heeded. But political science also doesn't get below the surface very often. I want to break down political institutions and reveal them for what they are--people. The State Department is not a faceless institution, it's a group of people with a culture all their own. They hate the CIA (another group of people with their own dynamics and practices), who hates them in return, and the resulting effects on foreign policy and especially the war in Iraq are costing lives. That's what I find compelling, and that's what anthropology is good at.
Unfortunately, there's hardly anyone studying anything current in anthropology. It's all too obscure, too outdated, or too academic. I've found four people at four universities I can study under and that's it. I don't know what kind of support I'll get in this field. Cultural anthropologists also have very lax procedures for...uhh...proving their claims. I feel like (and a lot of people seem to agree) that cultural anthropology is often just mental masturbation for its practitioners. I think I can do my own research with integrity and purpose, regardless of what my colleagues do, but I really don't want to be irrelevant. That's my biggest fear. I'm not content just being a stuffy academic. I want my research to have some impact.
Annnnd the worst part is, I have no idea how to figure this stuff out. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2007|08:25 pm] |
Oh oh oh, I've recently discovered the joy of free audio books. My ADD is completely out of control again (I'm going back on Ritalin--it's seriously affecting my daily life), so I haven't been able to sit long enough to read like I want to. I didn't think books on tape would work for me, but it's actually much easier to focus on them than forcing myself to sit in one place and stare at tiny text.
Libri Vox (www.librivox.org) is my favorite place to get free audio books. The selection anywhere is limited to books in the public domain, but they have the best readers. I just finished listening to Anthem by Ayn Rand, and I was surprised that I loved it so much. I hate that woman, but the story is amazing. And yes, I've tried reading Atlas Shrugged and it was way too slow and dry. Plus the picture it paints of the characters' devotion to capitalism is a little creepy even for me.
I've also downloaded Robinson Crusoe, Swiss Family Robinson (shut up, I like survival stories), Candide, Heart of Darkness, and The Count of Monte Cristo. I'm hoping the audio books will get my appetite going for reading again, which has been dulled by all the academic bullshit I've been forced to read over the past four years.
If anyone has any suggestions for good classics, I'd appreciate it. Especially good stories. I'm really really in the mood for good, entertaining, not quite so dense stories. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2007|07:53 pm] |
Well I am now a college graduate. Graduation was a lot of fun, although hot and long and weird, since I never got to know anyone at Cowell. We had an anthro reception earlier in the week though, so that was cool. We all got anthro medals to wear when we walked, and I had all my friends sign my stole. They made it completely obscene, of course, especially the word "PENETRATION" written in huge caps down one side. Fantastic. My aunt, uncle, and favorite cousin Janna came along with my parents and brother, so it was a blast. Then I went home for like five days, and now I'm trying to enjoy having nothing to do. I'm pretty restless though, and Amy's in Fresno, so I'm slowly driving myself crazy.
I'm still just working at the vet clinic and a little bit at Spencer's, but it's not likely that I'm going to move up at either place fast enough to pay rent. I got nearly $1500 in total for graduation, which is a staggering amount, but I'm basically living off that and it won't last more than a couple more months. I applied for five full time jobs at UCSC (the least of which pays $2400 a month--holy SHIT awesome) and I can't imagine that I wouldn't get at least an interview for one of them, so hopefully that'll work out. It'd be a lot of fun to work on campus and get to stick around a little longer. Only having two years at UCSC kinda sucked that way.
I still have no real idea what I'm going to do about graduate school. I want to study a little bit of everything, so I don't know if anthropology will get me there. But neither will politics, so I really don't know. I'm going to end up applying to politics Master's programs along with anthro PhD programs, so I'll sort it out when I find out who wants me. I ended up graduating with honors, a 3.65 overall, and something like a 3.72 in my major, so that's pretty awesome. I'm preparing myself for having to take more than a year off though, because I honestly can't imagine taking the GRE anytime soon and I'd have to start learning all that math...like now. If I get a full time job up here, I won't really care. I need to live a little anyway and do something other than writing papers with my young adult life.
Graduation!!
The pink unicorn shoes I wore with my gown.
Me and Amy before the procession
Dying in the heat
Throwin up the horns for graduation |
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| God I hate feminists |
[May. 24th, 2007|11:41 pm] |
I'm having to analyze the stupidest piece of trash I think I've ever had to read for a class. It's called "Not a Moral Issue" and it's be a radical right wing (not joking) feminist named Catharine MacKinnon. I don't have time to detail the stupidity, but basically she's making a not-so-legal argument for censoring (read: banning) pornography because it's a form of sex discrimination against women. Yeah, it's as ridiculous as it sounds.
But I decided to title it, "Not a Moral Issue: Not a Legal Argument". Strong contenders were:
"Not a Moral Issue: Not a Woman's Place" (thanks to Amy)
"Not a Moral Issue: What a Stupid Bitch"
"Not a Moral Issue: I Bet She Takes It In The Ass"
And simply:
"CUNT", for Curmudgeonly Ugly Nutjob Talks Shit (thanks Ryan)
Any other suggestions would be welcomed. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 23rd, 2007|01:10 am] |
Found out a couple days ago that a kid I went to school with forever was killed in a freak accident. He was watching a street race in Lancaster when a possibly drunk driver (no involvement in the racing) plowed his truck into the crowd. He died at the scene along with another man, and three others were sent to hospitals in very critical condition. And of course the coward tried to flee, but a ton of people jumped in their cars and chased him down. He's being charged with hit and run. He's sure to get the death penalty, especially if he tests positive for drugs or alcohol.
A lot of people get overdramatic when someone remotely connected to them passes away, and claiming too much grief over even less than an acquaintance's death can really cheapen the pain felt by those who were actually close to them. But I will say that it's a real wake up call, and it does hurt to know a person as good as Francis had his life cut short in such a meaningless way. Now a lot of equally good people--some I do know personally--are suffering a great deal and it's all very hard to watch, even from a considerable distance. At the very least it reminds you how important it is to get your priorities straight and appreciate everything you have. It shouldn't take someone's death to make you dig your head out of your ass, but nothing does it quite like death.
Myspaces become weird places when the people who own them die. They become a repository of memories, stories, pictures, and grief. Small details, like the last date they signed on and blogs they wrote themselves, become surreal little artifacts that signify some point at which that person literally ceased to be alive. I can imagine Francis's friends treasuring the last comments and messages he sent them, and pictures of him and with him become very precious. For all the stupidity that is Myspace, I'd go out on a limb and say there's nothing else in the world--even on the internet--that has the capacity to display grief and suffering and support and love the way it does in situations like this. It's really strange and compelling. Reading his friends' memories about him made me really nostalgic for my childhood in Moorpark and all the ridiculous things we did for fun.
Anyway, I didn't know Francis and I can't claim to be devastated by his death. It's not a lack of affect, I simply don't feel I have the right to be devastated when he has so many friends and family members feeling pain I can't begin to imagine. But I'm definitely moved and very sad for Francis and everyone who loved him, and if you're one of those people, I'm so very sorry. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 13th, 2007|01:18 pm] |
God I can't believe there's less than a month of school left. I was putting my grad announcements together the other night and it felt really surreal. And of course panic set in as I realized that less than a month to graduation meant even less than that to finish revising and adding 15 odd pages to my paper on memory and the Constitution. I made a little outline this morning to center myself a little. It seems a lot less daunting now that I've laid it out, but it's going to be a major challenge writing that much when I'm already burned out beyond belief.
Life's been incredibly busy lately, working at the vet, going to school, peer advising, and tutoring. I got another part time job at Spencer's this week and I'm really excited about it. Working at Spencer's was one of the funnest jobs I've had, and I already know how to do nearly everything, so the transition will be easy. I also applied for a couple full time jobs on campus, including a community college outreach position. That would be really really cool, and it pays almost $12 an hour plus benefits. It's pretty sad working this hard for a BA and getting very little out of it in the job market, but that's how it goes when you major in something academic. Working hard is really satisfying though, so as long as I'm making rent and paying off my debt, I'm cool. But this vet job is getting really tedious and obnoxious, so I'm looking to replace that as soon as possible.
The search for grad schools is...going. I'm trying to find good schools that are less difficult to get into than ivy league schools. Unfortunately the ivy leaguers have all the faculty that can help me for the most part. Not that I'd mind going to an ivy league school (I'd love it), but Christ I need some realistic options. University of Chicago is a little more feasible, and they accept an unbelievable 20-25 students to the anthro PhD program every year. They've also got these incredible interdisciplinary workshops that could really help me, and at least two professors who could advise me. So far I'll be applying to U of Chicago, UConn, Harvard, and Princeton. I have absolutely no clue what my chances are of getting into the latter, but hey why not apply? I'll have something like a 3.6 GPA when I graduate, and over a 3.7 in my major. This Constitution paper is pretty damn awesome, I've gotten involved a lot in my department, I have a guaranteed sparkling letter of rec from a Harvard graduate, and I'm doing a huge research project in Britain next year. I think I've got at least a marginal shot. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 29th, 2007|11:02 pm] |
God I only use this thing to read communities anymore. I'm working at All Pets as a vet assistant now. It's pretty okay--MUCH better than my first vet assistant experience--but I need more hours and I'm not sure I'll get enough to justify staying there after I graduate. I may apply soon at the local Spencer's in case they have a supervisor or even asst manager position open in the future. I didn't get the judicial fellowship, but that was expected. I was competing with law students and politics majors, and unfortunately they want to see classes on your transcript that speak to your law background, not just your personal knowledge. So I'm not entirely sure what I'll be doing once I graduate, but I'm glad to have a job of some kind right now to get me on my feet.
Just a couple more months before graduation! Becky, Steve, and Janna are coming out, and Elani might come too, so it'll be really fun. I just got the invitations the other day, so it's feeling very close. I was originally enrolled in Constitutional Law, Citizenship and Action, and Legal Theory this quarter, but I had to drop all but Legal Theory to do an upper division anthro elective that I was missing. I'm doing independent study with Caldwell, and I'm really just doubling my senior seminar paper and adding ethnographic research to it. It's going to make the paper infinitely better--even publication worthy. I submitted an abstract for it to the Association of Political and Legal Anthropology to hopefully be included in their section at the annual AAA meeting in DC. It cost me $200 and I won't find out until August, so this had better be worth it. Legal Theory is very interesting, and Constitutional Law was REALLY cool, so I kept the book and I'll pick it back up over the summer. It looks like I should graduate with at least Honors (hopefully Highest Honors--god I need that stupid shit on my diploma), and I'm still hoping somehow, some way I'll get Phi Beta Kappa. Anything to distinguish me will reeeally help.
Overall I'm really proud of myself and how far I've come personally and academically. My grades are phenomenal for the first time in my life (this quarter will for sure be the third in a row that I've gotten straight A's) and more importantly my evaluations are crazy good. I think I'll continue with anthropology in grad school, but definitely with a concentration in political and legal anthro. It's such a fantastic interdisciplinary, flexible approach to just about any topic. Unfortunately/fortunately the only schools that have anthro faculty studying what I want to study are very big name schools, like Harvard and UConn. It's unfortunate because the competition is so so insane, and it's fortunate because if I did get into a school like that, my career would be boundless and I'd have crazy funding (which I'll need because my parents certainly can't pay for me to get a PhD). I think someday I'd like to work for Amnesty International, although their integrity isn't always 100%.
The year ahead's going to be weird and tough. Not only will I have to work full time, school won't really be over. I'll have to start studying immediately for the GRE, including literally learning all that math over again. I need to keep doing research and try to get published to help me be competitive. I'll have to work on my applications and make connections with professors and god knows what else. It's going to be so hard to get into a PhD program, but I think I've really set myself up to have a good chance. I've worked my ass off and it's really paid off. I'm in the perfect living situation with cheap rent and a hawt girlfriend, and if I can keep from getting stressed about debt and the near future, I might actually enjoy taking a year off. I just hope it's less stressful than jumping straight into grad school and not more.
Oh, and UK trip in either December or next summer! Fuck yeah! |
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| An open letter to my dear, dear classmates |
[Apr. 21st, 2007|02:14 am] |
Yes, I made a "Hokey" image with our school logo. Not original by any means, certainly not artistic. And yes, we've all been absolutely bombarded with the V Tech shooting by the opportunistic media since the first shots were fired. Yes, everyone from Jack Thompson to Ted Nugent to those obnoxious Brady Bill advocates have been ceaselessly using it as a soapbox from which to trumpet their own agendas. Yes, there are hundreds of people dying more horrible deaths every day not only in Iraq, but around the world. Genocides are being ignored, children are starving to death, human beings are being sold like cattle, and the so-called "freest nation on Earth" is suppressing our rights every single day. In fact, they're arresting people for supposedly sympathizing with the V Tech shooter:
http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/student-arrested-after-talking-about/20070419005909990001?ncid=NWS00010000000001
This isn't really an unprecedented event, or one that's any more tragic than anything else that happens by the minute around the world. I can understand why people would get annoyed with the outpouring of emotion and media coverage that this particular tragedy is receiving, when so many others go totally unnoticed. That point isn't lost on me, and I completely agree that it's a serious problem.
What I can't understand is why a student body that styles itself as a conscious, caring, and sensitive one would actually lash out at people for displaying empathy for the victims at V Tech. Maybe it's the cynicism of the times, but here at UCSC (and likely elsewhere) you simply can't display solidarity with a group or an event without having your political motives or priorities scrutinized. Everything must be political. What was simply a gesture of empathy and grief--a purely emotional action--on my part isn't a glimpse into my priorities, awareness of global issues, or conformity. In fact it doesn't say much about me at all, except that I'm horrified by what happened and I feel for the victims. I know how bad things are out there and I probably know better than you do, since I live, eat, and breathe Iraq, politics, and human rights.
Maybe if I had in fact attached something overtly political to my little ode to V Tech, it would have gone over better. Maybe if I had used it to promote or denounce gun control, I could have stirred up debate. Maybe if I had blamed the shooter for global warming, or branded him as a meat eater, or an opponent of gay marriage, it would have seemed more legitimate. I guess I missed the memo that V Tech wasn't advantageous, cool, or divisive enough to care about.
So while you're rolling your eyes at a Microsoft Paint image I put together in under a minute to show a little compassion, allow me to issue my apologies. I'm sorry that I strayed from the "big issues" for a moment and turned my attention away from all your political power grubbing and towards something that evoked a gut reaction from me. I'm sorry that I wasted precious empathy on a group of people from which no great political ground can be gleaned, since we humans are apparently only capable of feeling for a certain number of people and causes. I'm sorry that I can't prove the legitimacy of my connection to the victims, since I really don't have one, but that's never stopped me from showing compassion to other strangers. I'm sorry I'm grieving for a group composed mainly of white, wealthy young people, but I don't really quota my grief. Finally, I'm sorry for sounding so incredibly self righteous, but I guess I'm just a little sick of every demonstration, every protest, every cause, every concern expressed on this campus having to pertain to some partisan issue. Sometimes it's alright to do something a little corny, a little self indulgent, a little apolitical just to show you can still empathize with other human beings, regardless of your affiliations. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 8th, 2007|10:44 am] |
I love that our presidential candidates are determined for us by how much money those weasels can raise. People wonder why we only elect money-grubbing bastards...
And as sick as it sounds, I hope this country is juuuuuust patriarchal enough to prevent Hilary Clinton from getting elected. I just might have a sex change if SHE is the first woman president in US history. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 1st, 2007|01:33 pm] |
Well I'm still in Moorpark because Chris had a major breakdown and my parents don't really know how to handle that stuff. But it all worked out and Chris is going to the awesome therapist we've all gone to, so it'll be fine and I got to actually rest my entire spring break. I won't be leaving for Santa Cruz until this evening, so starting my first day at All Pet's at 9.30 is going to suck after that drive. I'm really going to miss my family and my dog, and it hit me yesterday that living at home with all of them is officially over. Barring any disasters, I'm really moved out, and after June I'll be working full time and on my own in Santa Cruz. Coming home twice a month and being down here for a month at Christmas kind of masked that fact up until now. It makes me really anxious, especially since I'm almost certainly going out of state for grad school. I can't imagine seeing my family only a couple times a year for seven to ten years. What the fuck.
Anyway, I got straight A's again--okay, two A's since I took two classes, but that's still awesome. I hope to make it three quarters in a row this spring. My GPA is now 3.6 and I think with two more A's it'll be 3.67. That's amazing, but I still feel like it's not good enough. I'm applying to a couple ivy league schools, so I always feel like I'm never doing enough. I know I'm being irrational and too hard on myself, but I also know I have to work my ass off to do what I want. What that is isn't totally clear to me yet and I still haven't totally counted out law school, but my aspirations are way bigger than I really let on.
I loooove that three people in the past few weeks have told me they think I'm a big stoner. Why does everyone think that?? Just because I'm laid back? I've never been high in my life and that blows people away. I think it's hilarious. Well most of the smokers I know are fun people, so I'm flattered. I'd rather people think I smoke than be a type-A asshole. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 28th, 2007|03:06 pm] |
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...........
I GOT AN A IN MY SENIOR SEMINAR!!!!!!!!!
...............AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 26th, 2007|12:39 am] |
Well after three diplomatic responses from me, true to form my nutjob ex blocked me instead of facing up to the shit she did. I should have known not to fall for the "Oh I've changed" routine, but I generally like to hope for the best in people. So basically it was just another power trip on her part, knowing she could kick up a lot of hurtful shit for me again and then run off never having to pay for it. It's very very infuriating in and of itself, but considering she's a drunken loser with a Valium habit, how threatened can I be? She's a total coward through and through.
Anyway, I'm home for a little bit, but only until Tuesday becaaaauuuusssseee....I got a job as a vet assistant! I'm really anxious about it because it's going to be pretty intense, but I'll be so glad to be working a job with more hours. I can finally start paying off my debt, doing more shit with my free time, and saving for the UK trip.
I'm signed up for three classes for my last quarter: Legal Theory, Citizenship & Action, and Constitutional Law. I'll probably drop one of them, since working part time and taking a full load right before graduation is not that appealing. But I'm really really excited about everything I'm signed up for. These classes should really give me an edge in my concentration.
I'm going to be doing so much awesome crap this year too. In April I'll hopefully get called to do an interview for the judicial fellowship, in June I graduate, in July I'm going to Cato University in San Diego, in October I'll hopefully start the fellowship (assuming I get it--please GOD), and in December me and Amy might be going to the UK if I don't get the fellowship. I'm also submitting a proposal of my own for the next AAA meeting in November. I'm going to turn my senior seminar paper on the Constitution into what it really should have been and then make a big poster to present. It's better than actually giving a talk, because I won't have to speak publicly (hate hate hate that shit), I'll get a lot more exposure, and I can still hand out copies of the paper itself. It should really allow me to meet a bunch of awesome professors. God that would be amazing: presenting my OWN paper to real anthropologists. It makes me fucking giddy!
Man, after writing that, it's hard to even give a shit about Sarina's nonsense. My life is totally amazing, it's beyond comprehension. And on top of all that, I've got the sweetest, most supportive and understanding girlfriend ever. Amy's never gotten upset or impatient about this stupid ex drama. I really don't know how I got so lucky, but my life's so different than it was a year ago. Counting your blessings puts stupid shit in perspective. |
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